How to save a relationship with too many past lies?
I’ve been in a relationship for almost 4 years now, and have been living together for the past year. There was a few "mistakes" made and a few too many hiding things…lies… We both want this to work, but don’t know how to fix it. He’s got a few trust issues from past relationships…how can we go on fixing this so that we can be happy again before the wrong move is made.
There is also children involved too (i have 2 and he has 1 we don’t have any together, but my lil one has known his since a baby)
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You’ve got to work on rebuilding the trust.. that is the only way you can make it work this time.
really, i think you need couple’s therapy. don’t brush it off as something negative. it might save your relationship.
You could try to talk to him. Just sit down with him and talk about what has went wrong in the past, and how you could avoid it. Believe me, I know it’s hard, but it’ll will definantly help.
Trust is earned, it’s too bad you are already living together when there is this issue still BUT it is not too late. Build the trust and encourage openess by not being too judging. Forgive each other for the past.
Wish you the best.
The best and only way is to re-commit to eachother and forgive eachother for anything and everything in the past and start over. Leave the past in the past and start on clean slate. It takes a lot for both people to overcome the hurts and trust issues, but it can be done if both of you are wanting to. Starting going on dates again, without the kids, and spend time reconnecting. Pretend that the past relationship you had is over and re-build a new one from the ground up….and be prepared to respect eachothers possible insecurities and validate them by proving them wrong. If you need outside help, get a couples counselor.