Comments for Help Save A Marriage

Comment on Marriage Counseling : How to Cuddle by sougou

sougou — Tue, 08 Nov 2011 13:55:29 +0000

THANKS

Comment on Marriage Counseling : What to Do When Your Marriage Is Falling Apart by psychotherapy practice

psychotherapy practice — Sat, 06 Aug 2011 16:12:11 +0000

Very nice video. It is great that you suggest to try marriage therapy. I’ve read a lot of blogs about how marriage counseling does not work. Very few couples resolve problems on their own and need a licensed therapist to offer them a path on how to address issues. Thanks for the post.

Comment on how do i stop my parents from getting a divorce? by jjgirl

jjgirl — Sun, 27 Mar 2011 17:06:49 +0000

My parents just told me they were getting a divorce! They were married for 16 years! I’m 15, I can’t stop crying and thinking of how they ruined my life, is there any thing I can do to stop them from getting a divorce

Comment on Did you stop making contributions to your 401(K) plan when it became clear that divorce was inevitable? by abc

abc — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 01:03:59 +0000

I didn’t, but then I didn’t plan to split it with him either; if you are going to divorce and you have to split your 401k, stop contributing…..get yourself a good lawyer, and I don’t mean get one lawyer for both of you; get a lawyer that just represents your interests

Comment on Did you stop making contributions to your 401(K) plan when it became clear that divorce was inevitable? by Zeep

Zeep — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 01:03:59 +0000

No. In hindsight, there are all sorts of things I’d do to grab money before my ex spent it on lawyers, because her doing so drove the cost of my divorce up tens of thousands of unnecessary dollars. I would’ve taken the whole savings account instead of half; I did all the saving anyway while she did all the spending. I wouldn’t have paid for her cable TV because my lawyer said don’t take away anything the kids use. Ditto for the cell phone bills I shouldn’t have paid or the entertainment center my ex got for me as a gift – I’d have taken it with me.

But I don’t really see the point of stopping your contributions. You’re going to have to divide all your assets 50/50, including what’s in the 401K. What’s the difference where the money is when you split it up?

One thing I did do when it became clear that divorce was possible was refinance from a 15-year to 30-year mortgage so that my wife could afford to live in the house post-divorce without demanding alimony. That worked for both of us.

Comment on Have you ever tried to stop your spouse from filing for divorce? by CM

CM — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 19:15:35 +0000

He knows your intentions. He is stalling for a reason. I think he has a girlfriend, and sees you when he is lonely or needs familiar company. Move on !!! You are wasting your life waiting on him to get off the pot !!

Comment on Have you ever tried to stop your spouse from filing for divorce? by arealqt26

arealqt26 — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 19:15:35 +0000

I know that when I was going through our divorce in my state NY if you are still sleeping together then you want to contest the divorce you can do it. But eventually he will get the divorce if he wants it.

Comment on Have you ever tried to stop your spouse from filing for divorce? by Colleen O

Colleen O — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 19:15:35 +0000

Nope, but I wwas the one who filed. You can’t stop someone from filing for divorce. All you can do is when you are served the papers is to contest it.

Comment on Have you ever tried to stop your spouse from filing for divorce? by mykidsmom

mykidsmom — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 19:15:35 +0000

In most US court jurisdictions, you can’t stop a divorce if one partner wants to be divorced. You can get your attorney to delay the proceedings for awhile (and you will pay a chunk of money everytime you initiate those tactics), but eventually if your husband wants out, he’ll get his divorce.

Comment on Have you ever tried to stop your spouse from filing for divorce? by psi2006

psi2006 — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 19:15:35 +0000

Divorce seems to be a major event for you. I agree. It is.
Even though it seems as if most couples these days do it over and over again, it is a life changing event for many. If you’ve been separated for 3 years and you can’t get him to go to counseling, it looks like its time for you to move on. Filing for divorce is the first step in moving on. Most people would rather not get divorced (otherwise why get married in the first place). The one who files is not necessarily the one who wants the divorce, just the one who knows it is over.
Go to counseling by yourself then decide. Many (probably most) men see counseling as nonsense. They think they can handle things. They can’t. You could be stuck in this in between situation for years. He doesn’t want to make the effort to do anything. What you’re doing wrong is driving this non-relationship. He doesn’t need your permission to file for a divorce. You said you initiated the separation. Maybe its time to just end it and move on. Get legal counsel first. Pray for a win/win resolution. It really helps.